Training, no matter which methods you are a fan of, is generally thought of as: how you get your dog to do what you want her to do. But what about all those other moments in the day when you aren’t asking your dog to do something specific?

These are times during the day when your dog is not doing anything actively for you, but is making his own decisions about what to do. If you have made your dog very aware of types of behavior you appreciate then he will likely choose to lay quietly on his bed and chew one of his toys. It is quite possible however that although your dog is very obedient (he does what he is asked to do) he is not fully aware of what you consider “good” behavior so he may make a poor decision as to how to spend his free time. Then when steping away from your computer, you find that your very obedient dog has pulled your sunglasses off the kitchen counter and turned them into a misshapen twist of metal and plastic.

As you can see there is a big difference between an obedient dog and a well trained dog. A well trained dog knows what his leader wants without having to be told. I realize this sounds  bit like a 6th sense but it isn’t. This is simply a result of a very strong bond between the careg giver and the dog.  It isn’t magic although some people have more of an intuition for creating a bond with their dogs than others.

You can have a bond like this with your dog but it isn’t always easy and you may need to alter your preconceived ideas towards your furry family member.

FIRST: Realize is that your dog is not a machine. He is unlike every other dog in the world, he is unique. If you had a five Black Labs before, this one is different. Although all dogs learn in very similar ways, care about very similar things and may react similarly to the same experience, your dog is not the sum of his instincts.

SECOND:  Understand what is important to your dog. Yes, that’s right, your dog’s opinion matters. So find out what your dog likes! Does your dog look dolefully at you when you place dry dog food in his bowl for dinner? Does she prefer one of her bed’s to another? Are there some walking trails she seems to have more fun on than others? Some dog friends she gets really excited to see?

THIRD: Build trust. Trust goes both ways. I am always amazed by people who complain that their dog “doesn’t pay attention”. Then I meet the dog and although the dog has offered numerous attempts at seeking eye contact, the owner hasn’t looked at him once, so he gives up. Your dog needs to trust that you will also pay attention, listen, care about him. If you can show him that you are capable of these things then your dog will do the same for you!

FOURTH: Touch. Sure everyone pets their dog, maybe they give him a scratch behind the ears if they are really doling out the praise. Very few people actually spend the time to give there dog a full body massage. Massage is not only a must for building a strong bond with your dog, but also can help you discover hidden wounds and sore spots you may not have known he she had. Massage builds the bond with your dog partly because of the time you spend with her during the massage, but for your dog, it reinacts her puppyhood when her mother used to lick her clean many times a day. Massage from mom was one of the very first touch experiences your dog ever had and it was warm, comforting and has an extremely strong positive association. By touching your dog with long, firm, and slow strokes, you will tap into that touch-memory from your dog’s early weeks and tell her through your actions that you are her mother, her protector and everything that is good.  

All new training takes time but the bond with your dog can start improving right away. Every step builds your dog’s trust and his devotion to you. A bond is not one sided, it goes both ways. It not only shows you both what you each find important but it also makes you care what the other finds important. Now, when you sit down at your computer you can be confident that your dog will make a good decision about how he spends his time without supervision, because he knows and he cares what you think.